10 MORE Things That Suck About the Drug Culture!

As much as I like to think that drugs are the answer to all of life’s problems, if I’m being realistic about it, there are definitely a lot of things that suck about the drug culture. As I’m sitting here pinning over the fact that I’m not using meth, (“Oh poor me, I can only slam heroin all day long and get stoned.” Life sucks. Yeah, I know how lame that sounds.) I figured I’d focus my energy elsewhere. So, ready or not… the second incarnation of Things I Hate About the Drug Culture!

1. People who don’t think that they’re junkies just because they don’t mainline, or even use heroin. 

This guy knows what's up.
This guy knows what’s up.

If you are addicted to opiates, you are a junky. Pure and simple. You don’t need to IV to be a junky. You don’t even have to use

heroin to be a junky. If you are addicted to Oxycontin, Methadone, Morphine, Vicodin or Codeine, you’re a junky. But if you are addicted to Vicodin or Codeine, you should probably switch to something that doesn’t have Tylenol. Otherwise, you will fuck up your kidney’s permanently. Either that, or do what I do when I suddenly find myself with 25-75 Vicodin. Do a cold water extraction. The taste is bitter, but it’s fairly simple and you remove all of the Tylenol. But don’t kid yourself about being a junky. If your day revolves around how and when you are able to cop and use opiates of any sort, you are a junky.

2. People who go on Methadone maintenance but continue to use heroin, yet still tell you that they’re quitting. 

No you’re not. Methadone intensifies the heroin high. If you are using both you aren’t following the program. You are just getting more bang for your buck. So if you do find you are using less to start, it’s just because you need less. But that tolerance will go up as well, and then you’ll be addicted to two different opiates and a Methadone detox takes much longer. You are just hurting yourself, and you’re not fooling anyone.

3. Actually… Methadone in general is a pet peeve of mine. Especially when people try to push Methadone on you when it’s

Methadone Addict
Methadone Addict

easy enough to go to a Suboxone doctor to get a script. Suboxone has so many advantages over Methadone. Suboxone removes the ability to get high, or at least makes it much more difficult. (I’ve certainly circumnavigated the effects of Suboxone with enough heroin, but that option is not financially feasible long term.) You can’t OD on Subxone. It’s much easier to wean yourself off of and doesn’t require medical supervision. If you are serious about quitting, Suboxone is by far the best option. And don’t be nervous about going to the doctor just because you’re a junky. That’s what the Suboxone doctor is there for. He had to go through specialized training just to be able to prescribe Suboxone. He is sympathetic to the needs of IV drug users, otherwise he wouldn’t have bothered to go through all that hassle. And with all the money you are saving from cutting out your largest expense, you should definitely be able to pull together some cash for a doctors visit.

One thought keeps leading to the next today…

doctor4. Doctors who AREN’T sympathetic to the unique needs of IV drug users. You took the Hippocratic Oath. You made a promise to treat ALL patients and to act in their best interest. It’s like some doctors just don’t consider junkies people. One time, the hospital advertised for the treatment of abscesses and other drug related problems. But when I went in to have multiple abscesses looked at, I was given ample amounts of attitude and was told it was my own fault. Yeah, well… I know that. But I’m still here and I still need treatment.

(Side Note: After that incident, we just started treating abscesses ourselves. It’s easy enough to do. Just keep draining it and sanitizing it. You can even buy the appropriate antibiotics from an online pet store. The exact same antibiotics they prescribe for abscesses are used for birds and fish.  You just need to calculate the correct dosage.)

Another time I went to the ER for something totally unrelated to my drug use. Once the doctor saw my track marks, he told me I had a stroke due to my drug use (by the way…. I was trying to quit at the time, so I hadn’t used in a couple of weeks). He wouldn’t touch me – it was like I was a leper or something. He barely spoke to me – just about me loudly to the other medical staff. He wouldn’t even consider that it could be anything else. He almost demanded that I stay in the hospital to be monitored – even after the CAT scan results came back negative. I’ve rarely met anyone so thickheaded, stubborn and self-righteous. By the way, after a second opinion, it turned out I just had some nerve damage in my shoulder. I have never felt so subjugated and menial. A doctor should never make you feel that way – no matter what life choices you make.


5. Cigarettes are still a drug, so I’m including this one…. People who want to ban the use or sale of e-cigarettes. This is so infuriating it makes my blood boil. E-cigs have helped countless people quit smoking. New York wanted to ban them because people might view smoking as social acceptable. Since when does the government have any right to dictate what is social acceptable? In Los Angeles, they are banned anywhere smoke is. So I’m not allowed to walk my dog in the large outdoor park next to my apartment (Pershing Square, DTLA). That’s completely insane. No one is allergic to them. No one can smell them. They aren’t bad for your breathing. They cause zero pollution. It’s WATER VAPOR people! I should be able to smoke an e-cig in an airplane if I want. (I’m not. I tried the last time I flew. You can do it in the bathroom though. No one will ever know because they don’t actually smoke!) People have called them started cigarettes. Total Bullshit. No kid is going to think that e-cigs are “cooler” to start than regular cigarettes. But even if that was the case, the government cracked down on flavored tobacco because it was more appealing to kids. So if you must, do the same thing with e-cigs. Ban all the disgusting fruity flavors. But don’t try to make them out to be worse than regular cigarettes! Alright, nuf said about that. But… if “they” win and e-cigs are banned, I’m suing someone.

6. People who can’t handle their acid. Unfortunately, I find this happens much more with women than with men. I took some acid AcidTeston a plane ride once with my boyfriend. When we were partying later that night – with one of these girls – she gave us an unusually hard time about taking the acid on the plane. She kept rambling on and on about how terrible it would be, blah, blah, blah. I felt like I had to defend my actions. It brought the whole trip down. Why shouldn’t I do that? Just because you flip out and become crazy on LSD? Let me trip how and where I want. That same girl, along with another one of her friends, also tried to suck me into this conversation about how you just “need a good cry” on LSD. What? No I don’t. Why would I want to do that? Leave me alone, don’t pull me into your bad trip. I love LSD. All the time. In any situation.


7. People who only do psychedelics for the “spiritual experience”. I had been trying to get my best friend to take mushrooms with me forever. Turns out her psycho boyfriend kept feeding her all these lines about how they should only be used to experience a higher plain of existence. Finally I talked her into to taking some at a show with me. She loved it and it wasn’t a spiritual experience at all. Sure, I like to use psychedelics in that manner too sometimes. But more often than not, I use them for fun. It doesn’t need to be this whole big religious ceremony to “properly” experience them. They are recreational drugs, after all. This is something you see A LOT of in the DMT community. Many people on DMT Nexus will be happy to preach to you about the only “right” way too use DMT. It’s all horse manure. Use psychedelics any way you want. Personally, I think a balance between recreation and spiritual mind expansion gives you the best of both worlds.

8. People on the streets who pressure you to buy from their guy. They will either try to 1.) collect a fee. Or, 2.) ask for a cut of your stash. Leave me alone. Stop following me. I’m not giving you anything. Chances are, if I’m out scoring on the streets, I don’t have a dollar more than what I’m trying to spend on drugs. Yes, I know I stick out like a sore thumb trolling the streets of Skid Row. It’s like the lyrics from that Lou Reed song “I’m Waiting For My Man” – “Everybody’s pinned you and nobody cares”. Everyone knows what I’m doing down there. The same thing that everyone else is doing. But just because I’m white and female, people think they can make a dollar off of me, or get a free fix. Junk is not cheap on the streets. One balloon will barely get you well. There is no way I’m going to split my balloon with you. Scram. Leave me alone. I’ll find it myself.

9. Old addicts who want to impart their wisdom on you. I have come across this countless times. Last week at the needle oldneedlesexchange some old guy was yapping about how I shouldn’t use 29 gauge needles. I told him I have small veins, so a small needle does less damage in the long run. He went on and on about how if I would just go for a run every day I wouldn’t have that problem. Or that I should shower before I use, yadda, yadda, yadda. First, going for a run is not going to magically make my veins bigger. My problem isn’t circulation…. actually I don’t have a problem. I just have veins that are different than yours, so I do things a little differently. I don’t need your old junky wisdom. Once, a lady actually tried to pull a needle out of my hand while I was attempting a shot, because she knew that she could hit it better. That’s absolutely not cool. Besides the glaring fact that I know nothing about your hygiene or what diseases you might have… I know my veins inside and out, what works and what doesn’t. If you think you see something that will work better, chances are I’ve tried it and it doesn’t. I’m not some doe eyed innocent who happened to find herself on the floor of a bathroom in a homeless shelter on skid row with a needle sticking out of her arm. I promise, you won’t find a vein any easier that I will.

10. People who use NA as a substitute for their addiction. You see them in every meeting. They are usually the first ones to talk, the loudest ones in the room, and the ones who refuse to believe that anything but this program can work for anyone. Sure one addiction might be better for your health and have a lower risk of death then the other one. But don’t fool yourself into thinking you are more evolved than the addicts who still struggle with drugs. NA is not the solution for everyone. Just because it worked for you, doesn’t make it scripture. Nobody’s Addictaddiction is the same. We use for different reasons. We quit for different reasons. Our rock-bottoms are all different. No cookie-cutter program will work for everyone. I don’t want to substitute taking drugs with talking about not taking drugs. I know NA has helped a great number of people. I personally am thankful for it. But if you are just substituting one life-consuming addiction for another, are you really in recovery? Shouldn’t the goal be to life that’s not centered around drugs?

Along those same line- I’ll just make this little addition about NA. People who use NA to wield power over others and take advantage of their authority over new comers. I knew this one guy who used to lie all the time in NA. I heard him tell the same stories time and time again, but with different endings, depending on the point he was trying to make. He was trying to use real-life examples of what would happen if you didn’t follow the program as it was designed. He was misleading a very vulnerable group of people.  Some people use NA as a substitute for what is now missing in their lives. And some people need to feel powerful. If they are powerless over their drug use, they will find power somewhere else. Let me tell you something Mr. Big Shot. Having power over people who are trying to get clean for the first time is not impressive. They are probably the most vulnerable, least confident, easy to manipulate group of people there is. Why don’t you volunteer at an ICU for infants? Would that make you feel powerful? They’re just about as easy to control as the newly clean trying to pickup the shattered pieces of their broken lives. They want to believe anything you tell them if it comes with the promise of a better life. Don’t use your leadership position to control others. That’s an addiction in itself. And the worst part was that so many of the “lessons” he was trying to teach were complete hogwash. Like, if you drink non-alcoholic beer, within the night you’ll be slamming dope.

Again, a disclaimer: I have found NA to be very helpful and I don’t belittle all the wonderful things that it was done for people in recovery. But like any organization that is run by humans, it’s not perfect. But the world is certainly a better place because of its existence.

Pft. I could keep going, but I think I’ll end my little rant here. I actually do feel much better.



2 thoughts on “10 MORE Things That Suck About the Drug Culture!

  1. Thanks so much for sharing your story! It sounds like you’ve lived a very interesting and noteworthy life! It makes me so happy when I meet people like you who were born and raised to hate this one thing about above all else, until one day you see it for what it really is and recognized that’s it not better or worse than anything else out there, it’s just different. And mankind if terrified of different. We do everything in our power to remove different from our lives and stay sheltered in our own little comfort bubbles, completely unaware of the lives that are being destroyed and people we are hurting by being so shallow-minded and making these baseless judgments.

    That story about the diabetic dog is absolutely hysterical. I wish I could have seen the look on their faces. LIke “Does this guy really think he’s pulling one over on anyone??” haha.

    So, speed freak huh? Meth, specifically?

    Always feel free to reach out to my via email as well, deemsterdiva@gmail.com.


  2. I continue to enjoy your very informative articles in your blog.
    I feel that I should let you know where I am coming from so that you may understand me better. Up until the age of thirty I had a reasonably ‘normal’ existence as regards drugs. All the friends I hung around with were all into the usual stuff, starting of with hash then moving on through all the other possibilities imaginable except for one. There was always a big taboo on heroin, it was fine to do everything else but once it came to heroin then the rules changed, it was classed as crossing the line. Anyone who used it or even worse, sold it were viewed as absolute scum and to be avoided at all costs. Hence my limited view and understanding of the drug was very one sided. Soon after I was thirty I moved to Inverness, Scotland for work and after 2 and half years of more ‘normal’ life things went a bit topsy turvy and I found myself homeless and then in the system of living in bed and breakfasts and shelters and being with all the other homeless people. And that is when I was introduced to the world of heroin, needles and injecting. At first it was a shock to see but more importantly it was an education and an extremely important education at that. I made some very good friends when I was homeless and l begin to see things from a different point of view and I subsequently felt ashamed of myself and my previous ignorance and lack of knowledge on the matter.
    I some ways it may sound strange to say but at times I loved being homeless, although I would not want to go through it all again but at least now I am not ignorant.
    I also understand the whole culture of the heroin scene and I agree with you about methadone. To be honest, I have only known one person to go on the methadone programme and actually use it correctly to the point where they have given up. I understand that this is as much to do with the individual as it is to do with methadone. If the will to do it is not there it will not happen. I have heard so many people say how hard it is to cut down methadone doses, they say things like even a 1mg reduction is like hell, which I’m sure it is, yet I know that my good mate managed to do it so it is possible.
    When I was homeless my urine was in great demand because I didn’t take heroin and when people had to go to the rehab place for a piss test then they knew that my piss would pass with flying colours and then their methadone would not get stopped. It seemed crazy that all these people went on the methadone programme then still used heroin then spent so much energy thinking of ways to pass the piss test, either through using someone elses piss or using some very brutal quick detox methods which seemed to involve a ridiculous amount of cranberry juice. The sales of cranberry juice round the world must have a hell of a lot to do with people trying to pass a simple piss test.
    On Saturdays everyone on methadone gets a double dose because the chemists are closed on Sunday so you get to take Sundays dose home. Well that’s how it is supposed to work, the other option is to take it all on Saturday or, more likely, take it into town and sell it quite easily and then go and buy some heroin.
    I really don’t understand why these people go on methadone, it would seem easier to just stay on the heroin when you consider all the hassle that they go through.
    Another good friend of mine, who has since died, used to be on methadone as a painkiller, which although at the time seemed a dubious statement it is actually used as an analgesic because it is cheaper than other things like morphine. Anyway even though he was on it he also used heroin now and again, although he was at one point a regular user. He had to do a urine test for his doctors once a month but this was to make sure that he was actually taking the medication that was prescribed to him. He had about 70 tests previous and all had came back as positive in the sense that there had been heroin, cocaine, amphetamine, mdma and many others, although this did not bother the doctor, the doctor just was bothered about the methadone. However my friend in his glorious wisdom decided that he wanted to give the doctor his first ever clean test as regards other substances so he decided that he would use my urine and then put a tiny bit of methadone in as well as valium and then the test would be fine. The first time we tried it the doctor said fine and never mentioned it, so my friend decided that a month later he would do the same and that is when the doctor stopped his methadone.
    Seemingly unlike the rehab place where they just do a simple test at the doctors they don’t test for methadone itself, they test for a metabolite in the body which indicates that methadone has been through the actual body. The doctor had no other option than to stop his methadone and for 4 weeks me and my friend were on a constant mission to score heroin for him because he was having serious withdrawal symptons. It was so horrible to see my best friend like this and also so horrible to see how many other so called friends deserted him. Also the amount of vultures that started circling because they knew that he needed heroin was unbelievable, people turning up full of promises about how they could score easy, but all the time wondering what was in it for them.
    Eventually I persuaded my friend that the only possible option was to go to the doctor and confess the truth and tell him that it was not his urine sample. It took a lot for him to go and do that, but he did manage and the doctor, or should I say Excellent Understanding Doctor reinstated his methadone immediately. The doctor didn’t care about what else was in the test, he just wanted honesty and he was willing to be fair back, which ties in with what you were saying about doctors.
    Also I must add that ironically my urine that got tested still came back positive for cocaine and amphetamine which kind of defeated the whole purpose of why were doing it in the first place.
    One more quick comment about peoples attitude towards needle users, I used to go to the local chemist to get needles for my friend because it was easier for me to go than him. Some of the staff there were really horrible and treated me like scum, they would keep you waiting for ages and then when I would hand over the used needles their faces would be a pure picture of horror. Many times I wanted to ask them who they were and why they treated me like that. The irony is that it wasn’t even me who was using the needles and yet they were still judging me. A couple of years later another friend of mine had a dog who was diabetic, yes you heard correct a “diabetic dog”, and it needed daily insulin injections. After finding out that he was paying a fortune to buy needles from the vets I said that I would get some from the needle exchange for free. This time it was a different place and they wanted me to register and then ask a load of questions about how often I use and blah blah blah. In my head a little voice was saying “Go on, I dare you, say it, say it!!”, and so I did, “It’s for my friends dog who is diabetic” I told them. You could just tell by the look on their faces that they had heard to them what was the best excuse and example of denial ever. But it was the truth.
    Anyway, I should go now because I myself am a speed freak and am currently going at a 1000 mph and therefore I need to be doing some missions, like tidying up in the forest or something similar…. Someones got to do it.

    Keep writing and be HAPPY



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